I’m outraged by the Lebanese people. Not Lebanon but the Lebanese as a whole. I love the place, Lebanon is a beautiful country, but the people: NO. The Lebanese people are busy making the biggest plate of Humus and Tabouli but taking care of crucial things like running the country, no, that’s not our business and its boring in the end, who can be bothered by this non-exciting stuff? No we want to buy cars, more cars, until the fucking country is like a big parking lot. We want to go to H&M and Zara everyday and see what they have that we have not bought. And, akeed, when we buy shit it’s not because we really need it and make a use of it,(cars for transportation and clothes to cover ourselves) no, in Lebanon we buy shit only to show others, to impress and have people say “yee sho 7elow” then the people will later have a subject to gossip about for two or three days at least. We are simply the best people capitalism would wish to find, or we are people who are a pure capitalist product. Just to give you an example how silly and pointless Lebanese people are: Today I went to the bank to start a bank account and finally after I begged for attention I reached the right person who happened to be on the phone. So, I thought, she is busy working I’ll just sit, fuck with my phone, and wait for her to finish, but after two minutes sitting I heard her conversation. It went like this: “oh and we went to his parents to have dinner and then we went out and came back late” at this point I stopped staring at my phone and put it back in my pocket and started to eyeball her, so she told her friend on the phone hang on, gave her fake bank smile and asked me what i wanted. I told her and she was not happy (fake smile disapperared), she told me it’s a very busy day for her, and asked me to go find someone else and went back to her chatty phone call. It’s Monday after all who wants to work on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, and hey the weekend is here lets go to the mountains. One of endless examples of how silly and inefficient we are.
The internet is dysfunctional, the electricity is dysfunctional, the water is dysfunctional (we are a rich country with many rivers but only for picnics, and we love sitting by our rivers and we also love to dump trash in them after we finish our picnic), security is dysfunctional and only works when they are in the mood for it, and yes, akeed, for the politicians, they get to lockdown a whole citiy for their own security. Sho lakan? Nothing works properly in this so-called country. But yet when it comes to racism, sectarianism, and ignorance we are champions. I’m not going to bring the issue of being on time because I’ll slip into hypocrisy but I tell you after four years back to the so called country I manage now to be on Lebanese time (yee sho kool inta) meaning late, just because In the past I spent hours waiting sipping coffee all alone until the other Lebanese showed up.
Their best sport in the morning is sitting on the balcony and gossiping about anyone they can think about.
In the end when you confront the Lebanese about the situation of the country and the necessity to do something about it there is always one reply to this: “we can’t do anything about the situation, there are fingers of big powers fucking with us from the outside and the whole dysfunctional country is not our fault, these are regional or international countries, and most of the time both, controlling us”. It’s never our fault, we are innocent and always wishing we can buy that Mercedes. PS: being able to buy a Mercedes in Lebanon it means we love life.
I’m not even going to talk about driving in this so called country because I can’t comment on animals driving in their own jungle. The way Lebanese drive I can’t think of it as evolved human beings dealing with a machine. I know I might be insulting animals by comparing them to the Lebanese people, but the chaos and nonsense of the Lebanese people is very similar to life in a big jungle only the Lebanese one is a concrete one.
The Lebanese are so racist they are racist towards each other but always inferior to the white man. They are so sexist that even if a woman is a professor teaching in the most important universities if not married she is a failure, and her family think of her as an embarrassment to them. The Lebanese people will discriminate against all the Arab world saying, those Arabs are all backward tribes, but us Lebanese, no, we are civilization. We can’t see that we are just as tribal as the rest of the Arab world; each Lebanese belongs to a sect (tribe) and their loyalty is never to the country but to the (usually) corrupt sectarian (tribal) leader. The Lebanese people are champions in racism towards the Syrian people, but almost no one knows that Lebanon was part of Syria during the Ottoman times and that was not a long time ago. Actually, sorry, I just remembered we are not Arabs, we are Phoenicians, but we don’t know what that means. Where is Phoenicia, please tell me? And if you can locate it ya lebnane then fuck off go live there and leave this beautiful land alone. I find myself writing and writing and I should be working but it’s endless when it comes to talking about Lebanese people’s nonsense. Let’s put it this way, every day the moment I step out of my apartment the Lebanese nonsense starts hitting me from every direction. My brain is bruised.